We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
