I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
