So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
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