i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize
