I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
