The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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