But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
