The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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