i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
