would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
