Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
