About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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