why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
