He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
pray to the hookup gods
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
