Say something about gay babies.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
