I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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