come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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