I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
