She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
