u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize