But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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