WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
