I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
