Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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