hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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