hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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