we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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