well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
