Me. At least after what I've been through.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
