Ambien. No doubt about it.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
