when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
