I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
