you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
did you just send me my own nude
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
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