i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
