who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize