He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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