I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
How's work?
Spinning.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
