So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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