Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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