it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
