Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
My dick has a subreddit
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Randomize
