yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
