I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Just cropdusted the office
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
