i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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