I must be too annoying 4 u.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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