When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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