he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
