Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Randomize
