just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
