we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize