dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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