I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize